Transcript of phone call placed on March 8, 2010 at 3:47 a.m. PT to the private residence of overrated actor George Clooney:
[Repeated ringing.]
George Clooney: Yeah. Who…
Unidentified Caller: CLOOOOOOOOOONEY!
GC: What? Who is this?
UC: CLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONEY!
GC: Seriously. Do you have any idea what time it is? C’mon.
[Garbled laughter, coughing from unidentified caller.]
GC: Damon?
UC: Ha, no. This is Jeff Bridges’ ass. Even I can act better than you, Clooney! I’m more handsome, too!
GC: Alright, I’m hanging up.
UC: Also, your mom gives great head!
GC: Jesus Christ. Goodnight, asshole.
UC: CLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO–
[Transmission ended.]
Categories: Culture