Holy shit. My scratch-off ticket — it’s a winner. For a cool 10 grand no less. The ironic thing is I’m already worth millions, so this means nothing to me. I bet a lot of you readers could really use… Read More ›

Old People Suck Ass

So I went golfing today. Not the best weather for it — overcast and drizzly throughout — but nothing a rough customer like myself couldn’t handle. Old people, however, are another matter. Take the geezers who were playing ahead of… Read More ›

Stop Snitching

Right. So I was looking at some online porn at work today, just like I always do after lunch. That’s when I heard someone gasp behind me. “Oh my god!” This was Gus the Copyboy, who promptly dropped the stack… Read More ›