Good evening, fellow Americans. I’m essentially in recovery mode following the horrific events with which I was afflicted in April, but I wanted to fill you in on a big development. Turns out the stalwart leaders of the Tea Party… Read More ›
John McCain
Homeward Bound
My adventures in the putrid hellhole known as Arizona have come to an end. It turns out that Senator McCain was none too pleased with last night’s speech, and ordered his staff to put me on the first plane out… Read More ›
Speech Transcript, 3-12-10
The following speech was given by conservative pundit Oswald J. Carver III at the Phoenix, AZ Walmart Super Center the evening of March 12, 2010, ostensibly in support of Republican Senator John McCain. It is believed that the speaker in… Read More ›
The Senator Has Flipped His Lid
I just finished meeting with Arizona Senator John McCain to discuss my planned stump speeches on his behalf this weekend, and the man gave me a serious case of the heebie jeebies. I hate to say it, but I think… Read More ›
Arizona Is An Endless Burning Desert
Great Nixon’s Ghost, I never should have agreed to help John McCain with his Senate reelection bid. I just arrived in Arizona 30 minutes ago, and though it’s only 6:45 a.m. local time, it’s already hotter than the deepest pits… Read More ›
This Pundit For Hire
The very fact that you’re reading this blog is a strong indicator that you’re well-versed in current events. I’m not the type of person who appeals to morons, after all. Nor to whiny liberals, but that’s redundant. And I don’t… Read More ›
