I have a lot on my plate today, not the least of which involves acquiring a family-owned sporting goods company with 40 years of history, saddling it with debt to cover the purchase price, and eventually letting it slide into… Read More ›
Lesbians
Stuck Inside Of Maryland With The CPAC Blues Again
I won’t lie to you — my last-minute sojourn to the majestic watering hole of grand American thought that is the annual Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) has not gone as planned. First, I discovered that my invitation was never lost… Read More ›
Another Blow For Freedom Against The Liberal Drive-By Gotcha Lamestream Media
Ah, you’ve arrived — glad you could make it. Help yourself to the brandy and grab a seat; we have important matters to discuss. You see, Beef Products Inc. (BPI) — a company with a quintessentially patriotic name — has launched a brave legal… Read More ›
Frankly, I’m Not Sure If This Is Turning Me On Or Freaking Me Out
I mean seriously, what kind of woman walks into the beauty parlor and says, “Give me the Dee Dee Ramone?” Are we sure she’s not a lesbian?
1,461 Days Of Deviant Communist Hell To Go
So anyhow, this happened — another strong contender for the darkest day in American history. At least until Comrade Hussein Marx Obama Tse-Tung inevitably socializes all private industry, surrenders our nuclear codes to the Red Chinese, and uses the Constitution to… Read More ›
This Pundit For Hire
The very fact that you’re reading this blog is a strong indicator that you’re well-versed in current events. I’m not the type of person who appeals to morons, after all. Nor to whiny liberals, but that’s redundant. And I don’t… Read More ›
I Suppose This Means A Cleveland Steamer Is Out Of The Question, Too
Women: can’t live with ’em, can’t kill ’em. Take Nurse Lola, the vixen assigned to my care while I’m laid up at Uecker Memorial Hospital. “Look, honey, as long as you’re down there,” I said during my most recent sponge bath,… Read More ›
Who Doesn’t Like Hooters?
Not me, that’s for sure. And I’m not talking about the low-rent restaurant chain with the tackily dressed call girls working as waitresses; I’m talking about nice, round, fleshy boobs. Hurray! Show me a person who says they don’t love… Read More ›
